Tuesday, January 2, 2007

The Best Games You've Never Played (Pt 1)

I'm still kinda searching for a direction for this blog. Maybe the fact that it has no direction is a good thing.

Anyways, I was thinking about what happens to all those games that "slip between the cracks." You know the ones I'm talking about -- the Katamari Damacy's of the world. The Chrono Triggers. The games that you keep hearing about how good they are, but you never get off your ass to look into it.

I'll save you the trouble.

These are three of my favorite games you've never played. Go and tell the people.

#1. Herzog Zwei (Sega Genesis, 1990)
This is the best Genesis game ever made. Don't let anyone else ever tell you otherwise. Have you ever heard of Warcraft? What about Command and Conquer? Well, none of those (or any other) RTS games would be possible if this hadn't come along.
Herzog Zwei was the first RTS game, let alone the first one for a console (I'm sorry to say that I have yet to play an RTS on a console that is even close to this ease of interface).
Basically, you control this transofmrers-esque ship (it can fly, carry units, or turn into a little dude with a gun) and try to destroy your opponent's main base. To do this, you create units (Tanks, Infantry, Medic...etc) each with a different purpose attributed to it (attack base, defend, patrol...etc) in order to achieve victory. A well planned attack usually has your opponent's ship somewhere far away while you have several tanks attacking his base. The single-player AI is sub-par (the CPU of harder levels just has more money to start...no really change to the thought processes), but the game truly shines in VS mode. Don't just listen to me -- try it for yourself!

#2. The Bible Game (PS2, XBOX, GBA, 2005)
Look -- before you say I'm crazy, hear me out. This game is basically a sick and twisted version of Mario Party. So what makes it so great?
First of all, look at the characters you have to use. You've got the stereotypically smart Asian kid, the stereotypically redneck southern kid, the token black kid, and some retarded kid with a sideways hat for "street cred." Apparently, the lord hates Arabic kids -- his chosen people. Who knew?

Next, there is the gameshow system. Basically, you either answer questions (which can be set from hard to ridiculously hard), play a quick minigame (that often completely screws up the religious event that it's based on), or harass the other players. There is an event called "Do Unto Others" where your character either is forced to give points (whereupon your player is noticably upset at helping others), or you take from other players.
Finally, just to mess with you, there is a random occurance called "Wrath of God" that takes away all of your points. All of them. Just like that!

If for some reason, this doesn't sound hillarious to you (and to some people, it doesn't), just add alchohol to the mix, and you've got yourself one of the best drinking games on the market. Just remember -- you didn't get that booze from me.

#3. Guilty Gear X/XX/#Reload/Isuka/Accent Core (PS1, PS2, XBOX, Arcade, 1998-2006)

Unlike the other two games, you've probably heard of this one. The Guilty Gear series is incredibly fast-paced, and if you're good at it, rather deep. The combos can get to crazy proportions (although a BURST function is in place to prevent your opponent from locking you up in an infinite combo), and Roman Cancels (cancelling a move in mid-animation in exchange for some of your Special bar) make the game entertaining to watch. Espcially with those vibrant good looks -- I mean, LOOK AT IT!
Or, if you're like me and you suck at fighting games, you can still button mash and have a good time. Besides -- the tunes in this game are so kick-ass that you'll forget how much you suck at it. Also, how can you hate a game where everything makes reference to rock music from the 80's? For more on that, look here.

1 comment:

Stephen said...

Finally! Another person in the history of the world that's played Herzog Zwei. It was really fun when it was out, but back then, I constantly played Gunstar Heroes, the Shining Force series, the old Joe Montana football games and my Lakers Vs. Celtics.